04-01-03-三怪客泛舟记 [15]
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I did not want to give up the idea absolutely．I decided to go down to the edge of the river，and then splash some water over myself．So I went out on to the river bank，and I began to move carefully along the branch of a tree which was over the water．
It was very cold，and I thought I would not splash water over myself，after all．I would go back into the boat and dress．I turned- and just then the stupid branch broke．The next minute，I was in the middle of the river，with half a litre of the Thames inside me．
'Good heavens！Old J．'s gone in！'Harris said．
'Is it all right？'George called out．
'Lovely，'I replied．'Why don't you come in？'
But they did not want to．
When I got back to the boat，I was very cold．I wanted to put on my shirt as quickly as possible．By accident，I dropped it into the water．This made me very angry，but George started to laugh．'I can't see anything to laugh at，'I told George．He just went on laughing！In fact，I never saw a man laugh so much．In the end，I became really angry with him．I told him what I thought about him．He laughed more loudly．And then，just as I was getting the shirt back out of the water，I noticed that it was not my shirt．So I began to laugh，too．I looked at George，who was laughing so much．Then I looked at the wet shirt- and I laughed more and more．Because I was laughing so much，I dropped the shirt in the water again．
'Aren't you going to get it out？'George cried，between his shouts of laughter．
At first I could not answer him，because I was laughing so much．In the end，I managed to say，'It isn't my shirt．It's yours！'
I have never seen a man's face change so quickly．I tried to make him see that it was very funny，but he did not agree with me．
After that，it was time for breakfast，and we decided to have eggs．Harris said he would cook them．He said he was very good at doing eggs．People who had eaten his eggs never want-ed any other food afterwards．'If they can't get my eggs， they won't eat，'he said，'and they die．'
So we gave him the pan，and all the eggs which had not bro-ken．'Go on，then，'we said．'Begin！'
Harris had some trouble when he tried to break the eggs．He had trouble stopping them from getting onto his trousers．And he had more trouble trying to stop them from going up his arms．Finally，he managed to get about six of the eggs into the pan．Then he sat down and started to cook them．
It seemed to be very difficult work．Whenever he went near the pan，he burnt himself．Then he dropped everything， and danced about，and waved his hands，and shouted．In fact， every time George and I looked at him，he was doing this．At first we thought it was necessary to do this to cook the eggs．
Once Montmorency went and looked into the pan，but he burnt himself．Then he started dancing and shouting，too．It was all very exciting，and George and I were quite sorry when it finished．
■ 10 第一天早晨
我早晨六点钟醒来，发现乔治也醒了。我们俩都想再睡一会儿，可怎么也睡不着了。这是因为我们不需要早起了，而且还可以再睡上两、三个小时。然而，哪怕再多睡五分钟，我们都会觉得立刻就要死了。
乔治说几个月前，他也遇到了这种情况。他给我讲了这样的故事……
那时候，他在吉宾斯太太家租了几个房间。一天晚上，他的表走到八点一刻时停了，可他自己并没有意识到。睡觉的时候，他把表摘了，看也没看一眼。
这是冬天发生的事，因此早上天总是很黑。乔治爬起来一看表，正指着八点一刻。
“我的天哪！”乔治惊叫起来，“我九点钟要赶到银行呢！”说着扔了表，跳下床，匆匆用冷水洗了洗，穿上衣服，急急忙忙跑回去一看表，表又开始走了，现在是差二十分九点。
乔治抓起表，冲下楼。饭厅黑洞洞，静悄悄的，炉子没生，早餐也没做。乔治很生吉宾斯太太的气，晚上回来得好好和她理论理论。他拿着外衣，帽子和雨伞，跑到前门，门居然还锁着！乔治说吉宾斯太太真是个懒得要命的老太婆。他飞快地打开门，跑到街上。
他使出全力跑出去几百米，忽然注意到周围没几个人，店铺也没开门。那天早晨雾很大，天很黑，可是店铺要是因为雾大就停止营业，这可够奇怪的。他自己还得去上班，怎么别人就能在床上呆着呢？
乔治一共只见到三个人：一个是警察，一个是推着菜去市场的，还有一个是马车夫。
乔治又看看表，差五分钟九点。他站在那儿呆了一会儿，一动没动，好像还做着梦呢！他数数脉搏，又弯腰摸摸自己的腿。后来，他拿着表上前去问警察。
“请问，现在几点了？”他问警察。
“几点？”警察念叨了一句，“好吧，你听着吧！”
正在这时，钟敲响了。一下，两下，三下。钟不敲了，乔治问：“怎么才敲了三下？”
“对啦！那么你想要敲几下？”警察回了一句。
“九下，当然了，”乔治说，一边拿出表给警察看。
“你还记得你住在什么地方吗？”警察问。
乔治想了想，把自己的地址告诉他。
“那就好，我劝你还是悄悄回去，”警察接着又说，“别忘了你的表。”
就这样，乔治又回去了。
起初，他想接着睡，可他实在不想再爬起来，所以便决计在椅子上迷糊一会儿算了。
可是，怎么也睡不着。他想看看书，也看不进去，最后还是穿上衣服，出去溜达一会儿。
他感觉是那么孤独，那么悲伤。遇到的警察都以怀疑的眼光盯着他，还跟着他走。他开始觉得自己是不是真的干了什么坏事，所以一看见警察，他就找漆黑阴暗的地方躲。
当然了，人家警察也想知道他究竟想干什么。乔治说：“没什么，只是散散步。”但他们不相信乔治的话，后来两个警察和他一起回家，想看看他是不是真的住在那儿。他们看着乔治用钥匙开了门，便站在街对面，监视着这所屋子。
乔治进了门，想：“我得生个火，做点早饭。”可他的动静太大了，连他自己都担心会把吉宾斯太太吵醒，那她一定以为家里进了贼人，接着就会打开窗
I did not want to give up the idea absolutely．I decided to go down to the edge of the river，and then splash some water over myself．So I went out on to the river bank，and I began to move carefully along the branch of a tree which was over the water．
It was very cold，and I thought I would not splash water over myself，after all．I would go back into the boat and dress．I turned- and just then the stupid branch broke．The next minute，I was in the middle of the river，with half a litre of the Thames inside me．
'Good heavens！Old J．'s gone in！'Harris said．
'Is it all right？'George called out．
'Lovely，'I replied．'Why don't you come in？'
But they did not want to．
When I got back to the boat，I was very cold．I wanted to put on my shirt as quickly as possible．By accident，I dropped it into the water．This made me very angry，but George started to laugh．'I can't see anything to laugh at，'I told George．He just went on laughing！In fact，I never saw a man laugh so much．In the end，I became really angry with him．I told him what I thought about him．He laughed more loudly．And then，just as I was getting the shirt back out of the water，I noticed that it was not my shirt．So I began to laugh，too．I looked at George，who was laughing so much．Then I looked at the wet shirt- and I laughed more and more．Because I was laughing so much，I dropped the shirt in the water again．
'Aren't you going to get it out？'George cried，between his shouts of laughter．
At first I could not answer him，because I was laughing so much．In the end，I managed to say，'It isn't my shirt．It's yours！'
I have never seen a man's face change so quickly．I tried to make him see that it was very funny，but he did not agree with me．
After that，it was time for breakfast，and we decided to have eggs．Harris said he would cook them．He said he was very good at doing eggs．People who had eaten his eggs never want-ed any other food afterwards．'If they can't get my eggs， they won't eat，'he said，'and they die．'
So we gave him the pan，and all the eggs which had not bro-ken．'Go on，then，'we said．'Begin！'
Harris had some trouble when he tried to break the eggs．He had trouble stopping them from getting onto his trousers．And he had more trouble trying to stop them from going up his arms．Finally，he managed to get about six of the eggs into the pan．Then he sat down and started to cook them．
It seemed to be very difficult work．Whenever he went near the pan，he burnt himself．Then he dropped everything， and danced about，and waved his hands，and shouted．In fact， every time George and I looked at him，he was doing this．At first we thought it was necessary to do this to cook the eggs．
Once Montmorency went and looked into the pan，but he burnt himself．Then he started dancing and shouting，too．It was all very exciting，and George and I were quite sorry when it finished．
■ 10 第一天早晨
我早晨六点钟醒来，发现乔治也醒了。我们俩都想再睡一会儿，可怎么也睡不着了。这是因为我们不需要早起了，而且还可以再睡上两、三个小时。然而，哪怕再多睡五分钟，我们都会觉得立刻就要死了。
乔治说几个月前，他也遇到了这种情况。他给我讲了这样的故事……
那时候，他在吉宾斯太太家租了几个房间。一天晚上，他的表走到八点一刻时停了，可他自己并没有意识到。睡觉的时候，他把表摘了，看也没看一眼。
这是冬天发生的事，因此早上天总是很黑。乔治爬起来一看表，正指着八点一刻。
“我的天哪！”乔治惊叫起来，“我九点钟要赶到银行呢！”说着扔了表，跳下床，匆匆用冷水洗了洗，穿上衣服，急急忙忙跑回去一看表，表又开始走了，现在是差二十分九点。
乔治抓起表，冲下楼。饭厅黑洞洞，静悄悄的，炉子没生，早餐也没做。乔治很生吉宾斯太太的气，晚上回来得好好和她理论理论。他拿着外衣，帽子和雨伞，跑到前门，门居然还锁着！乔治说吉宾斯太太真是个懒得要命的老太婆。他飞快地打开门，跑到街上。
他使出全力跑出去几百米，忽然注意到周围没几个人，店铺也没开门。那天早晨雾很大，天很黑，可是店铺要是因为雾大就停止营业，这可够奇怪的。他自己还得去上班，怎么别人就能在床上呆着呢？
乔治一共只见到三个人：一个是警察，一个是推着菜去市场的，还有一个是马车夫。
乔治又看看表，差五分钟九点。他站在那儿呆了一会儿，一动没动，好像还做着梦呢！他数数脉搏，又弯腰摸摸自己的腿。后来，他拿着表上前去问警察。
“请问，现在几点了？”他问警察。
“几点？”警察念叨了一句，“好吧，你听着吧！”
正在这时，钟敲响了。一下，两下，三下。钟不敲了，乔治问：“怎么才敲了三下？”
“对啦！那么你想要敲几下？”警察回了一句。
“九下，当然了，”乔治说，一边拿出表给警察看。
“你还记得你住在什么地方吗？”警察问。
乔治想了想，把自己的地址告诉他。
“那就好，我劝你还是悄悄回去，”警察接着又说，“别忘了你的表。”
就这样，乔治又回去了。
起初，他想接着睡，可他实在不想再爬起来，所以便决计在椅子上迷糊一会儿算了。
可是，怎么也睡不着。他想看看书，也看不进去，最后还是穿上衣服，出去溜达一会儿。
他感觉是那么孤独，那么悲伤。遇到的警察都以怀疑的眼光盯着他，还跟着他走。他开始觉得自己是不是真的干了什么坏事，所以一看见警察，他就找漆黑阴暗的地方躲。
当然了，人家警察也想知道他究竟想干什么。乔治说：“没什么，只是散散步。”但他们不相信乔治的话，后来两个警察和他一起回家，想看看他是不是真的住在那儿。他们看着乔治用钥匙开了门，便站在街对面，监视着这所屋子。
乔治进了门，想：“我得生个火，做点早饭。”可他的动静太大了，连他自己都担心会把吉宾斯太太吵醒，那她一定以为家里进了贼人，接着就会打开窗