Scoop-Evelyn-Waugh [15]
Opposite him, at the table to which he was directed, sat a middle-aged man, at the moment engaged in a homily to the waiter in fluent and apparently telling argot. His head was totally bald on the top and of unusual conical shape; at the sides and back the hair was closely cut and dyed a strong, purplish shade of auburn. He was neatly, rather stiffly dressed for the time of year, and heavily jeweled; a cabochon emerald, massive and dull, adorned his tie; rubies flashed on his fingers and cuff-links as his hands rose and spread configuring the swell of and climax of his argument; pearls and platinum stretched from pocket to pocket of his waistcoat. William wondered what his nationality could be and thought perhaps Turkish. Then he spoke, in a voice that was not exactly American or Levantine or Eurasian or Latin or Teuton, but a blend of them all. "The moment they recognize an Englishman they think they can make a monkey of him," he said in this voice. "That one was Swiss; they're the worst; tried to make me buy mineral water. The water in the carafes is excellent. I have drunk quantities of it in my time without ever being seriously affected � and I have a particularly delicate stomach. May I give you some?" William said he preferred wine. "You are interested in clarets? I have a little vineyard in Bordeaux � on the opposite slope of the hill to Chateau Mouton-Rothschild, where in my opinion the soil is rather less delicate than mine. I like to have something to give my friends. They are kind enough to find it drinkable. It has never been in the market, of course. It is a little hobby of mine." He took two pills, one round and white, the other elliptical and black, from a rococo snuffbox and laid them on the tablecloth beside his plate. He drew a coroneted crepe de chine handkerchief from his pocket, carefully wiped his glass, half-filled it with murky liquid from the water bottle, swallowed his medicine, and then said:� "You are surprised at my addressing you?" "Not at all," said William politely. "But it is surprising. I make a point of never addressing my fellow travellers. Indeed I usually prefer to dine in the coupe. But this is not our first meeting. You were kind enough to give me a place in your aeroplane this afternoon. It was a service I greatly appreciate." "Not at all," said William. "Not at all. Very glad to have been any help." "It was the act of an Englishman � a fellow Englishman," said the little man simply. "I hope that one day I shall have the opportunity of requiting it... I probably shall," he added rather sadly. "It is one of the pleasant if quite onerous duties of a man of my position to requite the services he receives � usually on a disproportionately extravagant scale." "Please," said William. "Do not give the matter another thought." "I never do. I try to let these things slip from my mind as one of the evanescent delights of travel. But it has been my experience that sooner or later I am reminded of them by my benefactor.... You are on your way to the Cote d'Azur?" "No, only as far as Marseilles." "I rejoice in the Cote d'Azur. I try to get there every year but too often I am disappointed. I have so much on my hands � naturally � and in winter I am much occupied with sport. I have a little pack of hounds in the Midlands." "Oh. Which?" "You might not have heard of us. We march with the Fernie. I suppose it is the best hunting country in England. It is a little hobby of mine, but at times, when there is a frost, I long for my little house at Antibes. My friends are kind enough to say I have made it comfortable. I expect you will one day honour me with a visit there." "It sounds delightful." "They tell me the bathing is good but that does not interest me. I have some plantations of flowering trees which horticulturalists are generous enough to regard with interest, and the largest octopus in captivity. The chef too is, in his simple seaside way, one of the best I have. Those simple pleasures suffice for me .. . You are surely not making a long stay in Marseilles?" "No, I sail tomorrow for East Africa. For Ishmaelia," William added with some swagger. The effect on his companion was gratifying. He blinked twice and asked with subdued courtesy: