Pale Fire - Vladimir Nabokov [88]
Good Netochka, who had been looking singularly uncomfortable during this exchange, remarked in his gentle voice how sad it was to think that such a “sympathetic ruler” had probably perished in prison.
A professor of physics now joined in. He was a so-called Pink, who believed in what so-called Pinks believe in (Progressive Education, the Integrity of anyone spying for Russia, Fall-outs occasioned solely by US-made bombs, the existence in the near past of a McCarthy Era, Soviet achievements including Dr. Zhivago, and so forth): “Your regrets are groundless” [said he]. “That sorry ruler is known to have escaped disguised as a nun; but whatever happens, or has happened to him, cannot interest the Zemblan people. History has denounced him, and that is his epitaph.”
Shade: “True, sir. In due time history will have denounced everybody. The King may be dead, or he may be as much alive as you and Kinbote, but let us respect facts. I have it from him [pointing to me] that the widely circulated stuff about the nun is a vulgar pro-Extremist fabrication. The Extremists and their friends invented a lot of nonsense to conceal their discomfiture; but the truth is that the King walked out of the palace, and crossed the mountains, and left the country, not in the black garb of a pale spinster but dressed as an athlete in scarlet wool.”
“Strange, strange,” said the German visitor, who by some quirk of alderwood ancestry had been alone to catch the eerie note that had throbbed by and was gone.
Shade [smiling and massaging my knee]: “Kings do not die—they only disappear, eh, Charles?”
“Who said that?” asked sharply, as if coming out of a trance, the ignorant, and always suspicious, Head of the English Department.
“Take my own case,” continued my dear friend ignoring Mr. H. “I have been said to resemble at least four people: Samuel Johnson; the lovingly reconstructed ancestor of man in the Exton Museum; and two local characters, one being the slapdash disheveled hag who ladles out the mash in the Levin Hall cafeteria.”
“The third in the witch row,” I precised quaintly, and everybody laughed.
“I would rather say,” remarked Mr. Pardon—American History—“that she looks like Judge Goldsworth” (“One of us,” interposed Shade inclining his head), “especially when he is real mad at the whole world after a good dinner.”
“I hear,” hastily began Netochka, “that the Goldsworths are having a wonderful time—”
“What a pity I cannot prove my point,” muttered the tenacious German visitor. “If only there was a picture here. Couldn’t there be somewhere—”
“Sure,” said young Emerald and left his seat.
Professor Pardon now spoke to me: “I was under the impression that you were born in Russia, and that your name was a kind of anagram of Botkin or Botkine?”
Kinbote: “You are confusing me with some refugee from Nova Zembla” [sarcastically stressing the “Nova”].
“Didn’t you tell me, Charles, that kinbote means regicide in your language?” asked my dear Shade.
“Yes, a king’s destroyer,” I said (longing to explain that a king who sinks his identity in the mirror of exile is in a sense just that).
Shade [addressing the German visitor]: “Professor Kinbote is the author of a remarkable book on surnames. I believe [to me] there exists an English translation?”
“Oxford, 1956,” I replied.
“You do know Russian, though?” said Pardon. “I think I heard you, the other day, talking to—what’s his name—oh, my goodness” [laboriously composing his lips].
Shade: “Sir, we all find it difficult to attack that name” [laughing].
Professor Hurley: “Think of the French word for ‘tire’: punoo.”
Shade: “Why, sir, I am afraid you have only punctured the difficulty” [laughing uproariously].
“Flatman,” quipped I. “Yes,” I went on, turning to Pardon, “I certainly do speak Russian. You see, it was the fashionable language par excellence, much more so than French, among the nobles of Zembla at least, and at its court. Today, of course, all this has changed. It is now the lower classes who are forcibly taught to speak Russian.”
“Aren’t we, too, trying to teach Russian in our schools?