Of Human Bondage - W. Somerset Maugham.mobi [197]
“You’ve been a devil of a time,” said Griffiths, with a smile of welcome.
“I met some men I knew. I’ve been talking to them, and I couldn’t get away. I thought you’d be all right together.”
“I’ve been enjoying myself thoroughly,” said Griffiths. “I don’t know about Mildred.”
She gave a little laugh of happy complacency. There was a vulgar sound in the ring of it that horrified Philip. He suggested that they should go.
“Come on,” said Griffiths, “we’ll both drive you home.”
Philip suspected that she had suggested that arrangement so that she might not be left alone with him. In the cab he did not take her hand nor did she offer it, and he knew all the time that she was holding Griffiths’. His chief thought was that it was all so horribly vulgar. As they drove along he asked himself what plans they had made to meet without his knowledge, he cursed himself for having left them alone, he had actually gone out of his way to enable them to arrange things.
“Let’s keep the cab,” said Philip, when they reached the house in which Mildred was lodging. “I’m too tired to walk home.”
On the way back Griffiths talked gaily and seemed indifferent to the fact that Philip answered in monosyllables. Philip felt he must notice that something was the matter. Philip’s silence at last grew too significant to struggle against, and Griffiths, suddenly nervous, ceased talking. Philip wanted to say something, but he was so shy he could hardly bring himself to, and yet the time was passing and the opportunity would be lost. It was best to get at the truth at once. He forced himself to speak.
“Are you in love with Mildred?” he asked suddenly.
“I?” Griffiths laughed. “Is that what you’ve been so funny about this evening? Of course not. My dear old man.”
He tried to slip his hand through Philip’s arm, but Philip drew himself away. He knew Griffiths was lying. He could not bring himself to force Griffiths to tell him that he had not been holding the girl’s hand. He suddenly felt very weak and broken.
“It doesn’t matter to you, Harry,” he said. “You’ve got so many women—don’t take her away from me. It means my whole life. I’ve been so awfully wretched.”
His voice broke, and he could not prevent the sob that was torn from him. He was horribly ashamed of himself.
“My dear old boy, you know I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. I’m far too fond of you for that. I was only playing the fool. If I’d known you were going to take it like that I’d have been more careful.”
“Is that true?” asked Philip.
“I don’t care a twopenny damn for her. I give you my word of honor.”
Philip gave a sigh of relief. The cab stopped at their door.
LXXV
Next day Philip was in a good temper. He was very anxious not to bore Mildred with too much of his society, and so had arranged that he should not see her till dinner-time. She was ready when he fetched her, and he chaffed her for her unwonted punctuality. She was wearing a new dress he had given her. He remarked on its smartness.
“It’ll have to go back and be altered,” she said. “The skirt hangs all wrong.”
“You’ll have to make the dressmaker hurry up if you want to take it to Paris with you.”
“It’ll be ready in time for that.”
“Only three more whole days. We’ll go over by the eleven o’clock, shall we?”
“If you like.”
He would have her for nearly a month entirely to himself. His eyes rested on her with hungry adoration. He was able to laugh a little at his own passion.
“I wonder what it is I see in you,” he smiled.
“That’s a nice thing to say,” she answered.
Her body was so thin that one could almost see her skeleton. Her chest was as flat as a boy’s. Her mouth, with its narrow pale lips, was ugly, and her skin was faintly green.
“I shall give you Blaud’s Pills in quantities when we’re away,” said Philip laughing. “I’m going to bring you back fat and rosy.”
“I don’t want to get fat,” she said.
She did not speak of Griffiths, and presently while they were dining Philip, half in malice, for he felt sure of himself and his power over her, said:
“It seems to me you were having a great flirtation with Harry last night?